Bosan-Bosan Di Pagi Sabtu

i. Blaise Bailey Finnegan III (BBF3) adalah sebuah lagu berdurasi 18 minit dari band post-rock Kanada, Godspeed You! Black Emperor yang terkandung dalam ep mereka bertajuk Slow Riot For A New Zero Canada.

ii. Saya pernah tulis review ringkas mengenai ep tersebut di sini.

iii. Lagu tersebut memuatkan perbualan/temuramah yang berlangsung di antara ahli band tersebut bersama seorang conspiracy theorist/street preacher yang ditemui ketika tour. Tertarik dengan hujah-hujah beliau yang esentrik dan tepat mengena sasaran, band Godspeed mengambil keputusan untuk memasukkan sampel rakaman tersebut ke dalam lagu mereka.

iv. Lelaki yang ditemuramah itu menamakan diri beliau sebagai Blaise Bailey Finnegan III.

v. Selain lagu ini, sampel rakaman lelaki tersebut juga dimuatkan dalam lagu Providence dari album F#c# Infinity.

vi. Melalui satu temuramah, kemudiannya barulah ahli-ahli band Godspeed mengetahui bahawa satu poem yang dibacakan lelaki tersebut yang diakui merupakan tulisan beliau sendiri merupakan lirik lagu Iron Maiden yang bertajuk Virus. Ironiknya penulis lirik dan juga penyanyi Iron Maiden tersebut bernama Blaze Baley.

vii. Mungkin Godspeed telah menemukan seorang lelaki gila yang rip-off karya orang lain dan suka mengarut tak tentu hala di tepi jalan, tapi saya tak dapat sangkalkan kebenaran dan keikhlasan dalam kata-kata beliau tersebut.

viii. Apabila lelaki tersebut berbicara tentang senjata yang dimiliki, tiba-tiba saya terbayangkan pengganas Norway yang menembak mati berpuluh orang beberapa bulan yang lalu. Its really scary and creepy, to say the least.

 well...where are you coming from?
...well...i don't like the way the country's ran, don't you know, and, erm...that's pretty much what i was expressing in my poem. the government...the american government - they're sneaky, they're very deceitful, they're liers, they're cheats, they're rip-offs. i mean, the american government is one systematic government that...that nobody can trust. i don't trust them myself. 

and how long have you been writing for?

how long have you been writing for?
since i was four. 

d'you do this sort of thing a lot, like, open-mic kinda questions?
oh i love open-mics, i love coming here to do open-mics, absolutely. 

what kind of reactions d'you usually get?
usually, people are...are pretty much in agreement with what i'm saying. 

we overheard you before talking went to court today for a speeding ticket...?
that's accurate. 

right. d'you wanna tell us that story?
yes, absolutely, i wouldn't mind telling you the story. erm...i went to court today for a speeding ticket, and i told the judge, erm..."let me tell you something, and you listen and you listen good, i'm only gonna say this one time and one time only, i don't repeat myself for nobody," i said. i says..."i'm here to pay a speeding ticket, not to listen to your lectures and hear you run your mouth for an hour." i says "i'm here to pay off my speeding ticket...and i'm here to get my fines out of the way and get the fuck to work." the judge says "you can't talk like that in my courtroom, you're in contempt of court." then i said...i told the judge, "if that's the best you can do, i feel sorry for you." i said "why don't you just shut your fucking mouth for once and listen." i said "i'm not gonna take any shit." i said "i'm gonna pay my speeding ticket like i said." i walked up to the god damn judge and i hand him my 25 dollars and i says "here's my money, now i am leaving."
and i left it at that...

...then, before i left, i turned around and told the judge "i'm here to state who i am and be honest with you." i said "if they thought i was dangerous on the road like you're trying to accuse me of, wouldn't they have taken my license when i first got it? yes they would. and the judge says "yeah, you have a point," he goes "you don't need to get loud," i said "don't get loud?" i says "i've got every right to get loud." i says "you can't do a god damn thing about it, because i'm expressing myself in your court, and there is nothing you can do about it. you think you're god because you have a robe and you can put people up the god damn river for 20 years? well you're not."
and i left it at that... 

did you walk away?
yes i did...i don't like the judicial system, i don't like the government system, i don't like the police, i don't like anything to do with this country's government. i just don't like it, because...they're sneaky, like i said - they're deceitful, they're lying, they're cheats, the rip people off. that's the american government for you. america is a third world country, and people don't recognise it...and i think that that's pretty god damn sad, that they don't recognise their own country as a third world, third rate, third class slum. 

well...d'you have any weapons?
yes, i do. i own a high-powered assault rifle, i own a 12-gauge double barrel shotgun, i own a regular shotgun, i own a regular hunting rifle, i own a 9 milimetre, a 357, a 45 handgun, a 38 special, and, erm...i own an m-16 fully automatic ground assault rifle... 

d'you think things are gonna get better before they get worse?
no way. things are just gonna get worse and keep on getting worse. like i said, america's a third world country as it is and...and we're just basically in a hopeless situation as it stands. 

what d'you think this country's gonna look like in the year 2003?
y'know, i'll tell you the truth - nothing against you guys, but i don't wanna answer that question because...i haven't even got a mind that's that...that inhumane. 

are you ready for what's coming?
ready as i'll ever be. 

most people aren't.
there's a little saying...dates back for generations... 

go on...
be prepared for anything at any time from anybody, don't take no shit, always stand your ground. people wanna come up to me and run their mouth - guess what? i'll throw them through the fucking window...i won't think a thing of it. 

would you mind reciting your poem for us?
not at all, i don't see why...i don't see why i couldn't. 

there's an evil virus that's threatening mankind
it's not state of the art, it's a serious state of the mind
the muggers, the backstabbers, the two faced elite
a menace to society, a social disease
to brainwash the mind is a social disorder
the cynics, the apathy one-upmanship order
watching beginnings of social decay
gloating and sneering at life's disarray
eating away at your own self esteem
pouncing on every word that you might be saying
to attack someones mind is a social disorder
the constitution, the government, martial law order
superficially smiling a shake of the hand
as soon as your back is turned treason is planned
when every good thing's laid to rest
by the governments hate, by the constitution and their lies
and every time you think you're safe
and when you go to turn away
you know they're sharpening all their knives
all in your mind
all in your head
try to relate it
all in your mind
all in your head
try to escape it
without a conscience they destroy
and that's a thing that they enjoy
they're a sickness that's in all of our minds
they want to sink the ship and leave
the way they laugh at you and me
you know it happens all the time
but it only happens in your mind
the rats in the cellar you know who you are...
or do you?

watching beginnings of social decay... 

The Reason

(Ini entri yang agak jiwang merapu sedikit, jadi boleh muntah siap-siap kalau tak boleh terima. Saya terpaksa menulis dalam bahasa omputeh walaupun sangat berketeraburan sebab kalau menulis dalam BM memang serius akan jadi geli geleman tahap tak teringat dan akan berbaur macam lagu-lagu pop leleh 90 an. Saya tak suka lagu pop leleh 90 an.)

Honestly it's really bothering me if someone's asking me one reason (or more!) on why do i  fell head over heels for this one particular girl. And it really sends shivers down my spine if the one's asking curiously, you know, with her eyes staring at yours like those executioners waiting to chop your head off, is that girl herself! Arrgh, what have I gotten myself into, i would say.

Seriously to say though, I have none.

Not because I was in severe state of panic attack by that question, but honestly because i really couldn't think of one. Or maybe I don't even have any.

Consider this, will ya.

If I say that I love her because of her fun-loving and carefree personality, is that means that I would leave her when she's not in the mood, or when one day she's got sick and she's terribly in pain that she can barely open her mouth?

If I say that I love her because she is kind and caring, is that means that I would leave her when one day she suffers from a tragedy and she could no longer care about the others, let alone herself?

If I say that I love her because she is beautiful and attractive, is that means that I would leave her once she's getting old and wrinkles started shown on her face and all that, she's no longer beautiful and attractive?

You see, in my opinion (I don't know about you, though) you don't need to find one particular reason to fall for someone. When the time comes, it just happens. But as a Muslim, we are all aware that we have been given some guide lines on choosing our soul mate (or mates, hehe) so if you have to find one solid, particular reason, that would be it.

Back to the story, in the end I still have to state the reasons even my little heart said otherwise, but I opted to choose a safe path, you know, those cliche answers, hehe.

"Give me one good reason or say hello to your new mates in hell!"

A Pack of Ciggies Does Its Magic


Setiap hari sabtu jika saya pulang ke rumah ketika bersekolah asrama dahulu saya akan sentiasa menghabiskan masa bersama rakan-rakan di pekan. Berbual kosong, bermain snooker, jamming, berlari-lari sekitar pekan menyelematkan diri dari polis kerana bergaduh di stesyen bas macam main polis sentri dan sebagainya merupakan aktiviti minguan kami.

Yang menariknya kami mempunyai semangat kerjasama. Jika seorang hamba Allah yang pemurah ini mengeluarkan sebatang ciggy untuk dihisap, ia akan digilir-gilirkan hinggalah ke sedutan yang terakhir. Sepam seorang. 

Jadi jika ada sepuluh orang yang menghisap sebatang ciggy yang sama, maka secara tidak langsungnya bolehlah dianggap mereka-mereka itu (termasuk saya sendiri) bergilir-giliran mencium molot masing-masing sesama sendiri dengan tanpa segan silunya. (urggh)


Saya mula hisap ciggy ketika darjah empat, terpengaruh dengan rakan-rakan sekampung yang gemar menghisap di dalam semak. Hisap ciggy sahaja, bukan hisap benda lahanat lain. Dan saya mula berhenti ketika tingkatan empat atau lima, tak ingat. Juga tak ingat atas sebab apa.


Bekerja di tapak pembinaan jika anda seorang lelaki tulen tetapi tidak menghisap ciggy anda boleh dikategorikan sebagai spesis yang jarang ditemui. Rare breed bak kata orang. Jarang-jarang. Jarang-jarang macam jarang sekali siaran astro kau tidak akan terganggu masa hujan walaupun makin lama caj astro makin naik tapi servis masih macam bangang dan siaran banyak ulang-ulang. Sampai begitu sekali dia punya tahap jarang.


Dulu saya rare breed dalam tapak pembinaan tapi mulai baru-baru ini tidak lagi. Kerana tekanan yang semakin melampau saya mula hisap ciggy. Hakikatnya bukanlah sedap sangat pun hisap bende alah tersebut. Sudahlah membazir duit, lepas hisap pasti tekak rasa loya-loya dan kepala pening-pening. Tapi yang peliknya ia agak mujarab dalam menghilangkan tekanan. Yahudi betul.


Saya harap lepas habis praktikal (atau mungkin lebih awal) saya boleh berhenti menghisap. Setiap asap yang saya hisap dan hembus umpama menghisap rasa bersalah yang teramat dan menghembus pergi kepercayaan mereka-mereka yang rapat dengan saya. (pergh, ayat)